WHAT SORT OF AVATAR IS HE?

 
Myself and Deshmukh were standing side by side. Baba was giving His Final Embrace to sahawasis. I too received the last embrace from Baba and I felt so romantic, I wished I could have one more. But, how could I dare ask for an additional embrace when none else was given. I kept quite suppressing my desire.

I left Baba along with Dr. Deshmukh, to get ready to reach Ahmednagar Station to catch the train. Once again, while departing, I waved my hand saying Tata to Baba. Suddenly Baba smiled and asked me to come closer to Him. I did so immediately. Baba tightly embraced me for the second time and that made me realise that Baba would never allow any suppression in the heart of His lover (although I was still not a lover). I was very happy full of ecstasy. Deshmukh at once said, "You are so fortunate."

In the very next moment, Baba said through His gestures, "Remember, this second embrace which I have just given, is not for you; it is for your wife. You carry the same straight from here, and give it to your wife. Also remember that you should not embrace any one until you have given my embrace to your wife."

All my joy ended, as I was put in such a funny situation. Then began a great Tamasha (fun). So many lovers — sahawasis — would come to me and spread their arms to embrace me saying "Jai Baba". But, I would not embrace them except saying "Jai Baba". Ultimately, I was fed up and locked-up that embrace with closed arms by cross- folding the hands. No one knew the secret. Everyone thought me to have become mad.

Throughout the journey, I was restless. No sleep in spite of First Class reservation. For 24 hours in the train I felt I was carrying the Embrace — something more precious than all the wealth of this world.

When I returned to Kharagpur and reached my residence at about 8 p.m., I knocked at the door. As soon as she opened the door, I threw away the bag and baggage from my hands and embraced my wife tightly saying "Jai Baba"..... It is from Baba. Now I am free. Oh! how difficult it is to carry a single embrace...."

My brothers, sisters, mother and other children at the house, who were all looking at such behaviour of mine, were standing still. My wife got totally upset and annoyed and started muttering indistinctly, "What nonsense! What has happened to you at Meherabad? Are you in a sound state of mind?"

I had no answer ... I kept quiet ... silently wondering as to what really happened to me at the Sahawas in Meherabad.

A little later, when I was in my bed-room my wife came and sat in a strange mood right in front of me and with a disgusting voice remarked, "Who is this Meher Baba? What sort of Avatar is he? Never go to Meherabad again... You will be spoiled...."

But Beloved Baba had already sown the seeds of His love in our hearts ....... These seeds were bound to sprout-forth in due course.