FOR ME OR FOR FOOD?

 
It was after 11:00 when Baba left the pandal from the morning's program, but by 12:30 He was on the move again; this time visiting a rice mill in town where arrangements had been made for Baba to serve food to poor families. [February 10, 1954]

The plans had been worked out in advance and the poor had already assembled by the time Baba arrived. Huge pots of cooked food were ready for Baba who began the distribution by personally serving some of the men, women and children who had gathered. Then others continued serving the large crowd which had come.

Meanwhile, Chaggan, who used to cook for Baba and also helped Eruch in attending to Baba's personal needs, noticed a small group of people standing under a tree outside the Travellers Bungalow. On inquiring, he discovered that they were Baba lovers from Andhra who had been traveling with Baba. One of them, Manik, explained that Baba had asked them to join His group and to tour Andhra with Him.

However, due to the pressure of attending to so many details, the organizers had somehow not been informed that these five people were part of Baba's party. So they had been told to find their own accommodations and see to their own food. They had not been permitted to have their breakfast with Baba's mandali, nor were they allowed to stay in the school building. Manik, who had a bit of a temper in those days, was eager to see Baba to complain to Him about this treatment.

It should be added here that such confusion or misunderstandings were not uncommon during Baba's tours, but these incidents brought to the surface negative feelings which had to be faced (in this case Manik's resentment of KDRM's way of handling things). And the final result was always that those involved came closer to Baba in their love for Him.

Baba plays His game not only through clarity and understanding, but also through confusion and misunderstandings.

Chaggan was sympathetic and, on his own, went inside and brought out sweets and fruit that had been offered to Baba. The group was happy to receive such bounty from Baba's residence and their spirits were quickly restored.

A little after this, Baba returned and was informed by Chaggan of what had transpired. Baba came outside and called the group to Him. He asked them why they were there even though they knew it was time for Baba to rest and that He didn't want to be disturbed.

They were all contrite, but Manik, who had not gotten over his irritation at KDRM, began to complain about how they had been treated.

Baba did not look pleased.

His annoyance was not directed at KDRM, however, but at Manik. In a fiery mood He demanded, "What did you come here for? Did you come for Me, or for food?"

As soon as Baba asked this, Manik realized his folly in disturbing Baba over such a trivial matter and repented his petty-mindedness. But Baba continued, "Do you remember when I was at Vijayawada? To attend the darshan program you had forgotten to inform Me about, I went without food for you, and now you cannot go without food for Me. And on My birthday!"

By this time, Manik and the others were in tears and they begged Baba's forgiveness. They apologized for displeasing Baba and in their hearts they were indeed sorry that they had allowed any consideration of their own comfort to inconvenience Him.

This sincere repentance on their part changed Baba's mood and, suddenly concerned and compassionate, He assured them, "I will see that from now on you get food wherever you go with Me. Today too." Baba then called for food to be brought from inside.

This loving kindness made them all feel their unworthiness even more. They said, "Baba, Chaggan already gave us some food. We don't need anything more." But Baba insisted and had a big basket of sweetmeats brought out which He then began to personally distribute to all of them.

Baba did this by tossing the sweets, throwing them in one direction while looking in another. The heavy atmosphere lifted and light-hearted merriment prevailed.

Baba's ways are such that His rebukes make one want to love Him more, while his love makes one realize how unworthy of it one is. And yet, after letting His lovers experience this, Baba's compassion wipes away any lingering feelings of bitterness or self-recriminations.

He makes one feel new and refreshed in His ever redeeming love.