OPENING
of the
HEART

Katie Rose

2004 © Katie Rose



CONTENTS

YOUR GREAT LOVE
FIRE AND LIGHT
HOW CAN I...?
LOVE REMEMBERS
WONDER
YOUR LEAVING
TWO-EDGED SWORD
BAL NATU
I HAVE SEEN THAT YOU ARE LOVE
EMPTY
MY HEART SINGS, FRIEND
SILENCE DAY DITTY
LIFE'S SOMETIMES SWEET
THAT PRESENCE WITHIN
AGAIN
LOVE GROWS
DIVINE BLESSINGS
I LOVE YOU
ALLAH, ALLAH
I WANT
DANCING, MY BELOVED
RESURRECTION POEM
WITHOUT YOUR LOVE
PERFECTION
MORNING POEM TO BABA
YES, BABA
LEGACY OF LOVE
THIS IS NOT THE TIME
INTO YOUR EMBRACE
WHAT IS REAL
IF I COULD LOVE YOU
WHO IS THE ONE
IN YOUR SWEET EMBRACE
THE IMPOSSIBLE BECOMES EASY
LOVE DIVINE
SO MUCH LOVE ALL AROUND
SILENCE DAY BEGINS...
THE EGO KNOWS SURRENDER ... LOVE KNOWS ONENESS
I AM LOVING YOU
THIS WONDROUS LOVE
HEED NOT THE MIND
THE KAABA OF THE HEART
MY LIFE IS MY PRAYER AND PRAISE
THIS MORNING ALL TENDERNESS
LOVE CAME
LOVE TRICKS YOU
IN LOVE'S BLAZING FURNACE
I CAN SEE BEYOND
HOW LONG
DANCE IN RHYTHM
THANK YOU FOR BEING THERE!
THERE ARE NO WORDS
LOVE IS
I HAVE GIVEN UP SO MUCH
IT IS IMPORTANT TO RELEASE JUDGMENTS
I THINK I AM READY
LOVE PICKS YOU UP
LOVE LEAVES NO TRACE
YOUR PRESENCE HAS IGNITED A FIRE IN MY HEART
LOVE IS DEEP IN THE EYES
SOMETIMES EMPTY
LOVE IS RAPTUROUS
I AM SO HELPLESS
WHAT BLISS THE QUIET MIND
LOVE SINGS ENCHANTING MELODIES
I AM FIGHTING
YOU ARE MY FRIEND, MY BELOVED
SOFTLY POURS A GENTLE STREAM
I WANTED TO ALWAYS BE WITH YOU
IF I COULD TOTALLY SURRENDER
IF I COULD GET OUT OF MYSELF
WHATEVER HAPPENS
TRANSFORMATION OFTEN INVOLVES SEISMIC INNER UPHEAVAL
THERE ARE MANY DIFFERENT TEARS
ONLY LOVE IS REAL
ONCE YOU GIVE YOUR LIFE AWAY
A WAKING ALLEGORY ABOUT ACQUIRING
THE INTOXICATING TASTE FOR "LOVING GOD"

INSPIRED LOVE RAMBLE AND PRAYER
LOVE HAS MADE ME A BEGGAR
ALL THAT HAPPENS
A ROSE IS THE SPLENDOR OF THE ONE
WHAT IS THERE TO TELL?
NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU DESIRE THE FLOWER
ONCE IN A DREAM
THIS LIFE ALWAYS HAS TESTS
HEART ACHE
LOVE RAMBLE #2
AH, YOUR WINGS!
MY HEART MET HIS AND I EXPLODED IN LOVE
YOU CANNOT CHANGE THE COURSE OF DESTINY
EMPTY BELL RINGING
I SAW THE BLACK BIRD OF SORROW
I AM SO UTTERLY HUMBLED
SEPARATION
MY LOVE FOR YOU
GIVE EVEN MORE THANKS
ENDLESS TEARS
WHERE DOES THIS TENACITY COME FROM?
SOMETIMES
A GENTLE BREEZE
YOU ARE
SUDDENLY
A SUDDEN WELLING UP OF EMOTION
GRIEF ON MY PLATE
I WILL CREATE
HOW DO I LOVE YOU
MOVING CLOSER AS THE RIVER EMPIES INTO THE OCEAN
SOMETIMES I WEEP AND SMILE
I AM SO TOUCHED



YOUR GREAT LOVE

what a blessed gift
your being with me
in the early morning hours,
requesting what my ego
would resist,
were You not
most important.

when you asked
i replied "Yes, Baba"
without hesitation
apologies
or explanations,
because
You are most High.

You beamed, turning rosey
with delight at
my caring more to obey
than self-protect.

How could i do otherwise
when You, Omniscient Lord,
are the One who knows,
cares and helps
in all-ways,
always.

Then you grasped my hand
squeezing it with warmth
and Love Divine,
eloquently saying

"I am very pleased with you.
Everything will turn out fine."

Only because You,
Beloved Baba,
have graced my life
with your Great Love.

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FIRE AND LIGHT

Your fire burns away my self,

Your radiance illumines my being with Love,

I'm consumed and filled
by your transforming Light.

What mystery! O, Resplendent One!

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HOW CAN I...?

How can i tell you
what the mind does not know?

How can i whisper the fragrance
of the Divine?

How can i point out the One
when nothing else exists?


The silence is thundering.

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LOVE REMEMBERS

fuzzy soup
i swim in
where nothing exists
except now

and
now and
now,
and now

stretching into undivided infinity.

soft and cuddly
like a favorite
comforting teddy bear

slowed mind
isn't hearing
ego's crackling
insistence
on fear
and separation.

where there was sadness
joy now abounds,
and where there was darkness
glowing light pervades
happiness
bubbling up
just because

the space between the molecules
has expanded
and light and buoyancy
replace leaden depression

when dark nights' remnants
raise their head
and form a garland
on grief's tombstone,
love remembers

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WONDER

"What is it you want?", i ask.

"nothing", you say.

"how do i give you that?", i enquire.

"don't try", you reply.

i look at you, puzzled.

you smile effulgently.

i wonder...

why is this so hard?

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YOUR LEAVING

How many times have you left me
With abandonment as my companion,
Fulfilling your own ends?

This time your leaving
Is from Love,
And resistent though i may be,
Such bitter medicine
Is divinely ordained.

Someday my heart
will say thanks.

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TWO-EDGED SWORD

ah, Baba

what a two edged sword
your gift of your Presence,
finding you and
feeling you
in Everything:
each sparkling leaf
each word spoken
each step taken
every smile
every thought
every squirrel chatting
every osprey flying
every cup of tea sipped —
every is-ness
a reflection
of your divinity;
any and every moment
you were there,
permeating
every thing
and not thing

and it filled
my every pore
transporting me
to a State
of finite duration

as after weeks
it began fading
slowly taking leave
as sadly i watched
a ghost image
merging into vastness
my solid self weeping
for a loss
of nothing
that was Everything

and now i am here
no doubt changed
forever,
but missing
that immersion in
Everything is You
and
Only You Exist

ah this mind,
these sanskaras
loosened and unwound,
are still running
in dream circles
i call me.

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BAL NATU

i sing your praises
elder brother
as one who has
loved so well,
shined so brightly
through trials and doubts
reaching the prize
of a lover's journey:
total surrender
at His feet.

your tenderness
smile and sweetness
your wisdom
sensitivity and humility
have nourished our
grateful hearts

may blessed union
be yours
in the One

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I HAVE SEEN THAT YOU ARE LOVE

i have seen
that you are Love
without ego
without form
without limit

you are It and That.
All that ever was,
and will be,
come to us
on our level of
gross consciousness
and human flesh

so that we can know you
just a little, ever yearning
to be more and more
in your gaze and arms

to remember You
is to contact our very soul's
source, and
meet it face to face
in acknowledgment
of Oneness.

your are indeed the embodiment
of love, mercy and compassion,
infinitely showering us
with your sweet care
on our journey home

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EMPTY

hanging in there
one breath at a time,
swimming
in a vacant
pastel zone
where no
ecstatic highs
or leaden lows
exist


sometimes empty
feels like loss

and sometimes
like gain

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MY HEART SINGS, FRIEND

you smiled...
our eyes locked
and held their position
into eternity,

connecting us forever
is a palpable lovestream
of golden light.

yesterday you left
that old body.

my heart sings
for your release
and your joy

at being One
with the Beloved.

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SILENCE DAY DITTY

I have told you 'everything is fine'
DO NOT WORRY, you are mine.

Sing and play, enjoy your day,
moving along in Love's own way.

Never waver in the heart,
Let mind be here and there.
You and I are never apart,
'Tis Love divine we share.

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Life's sometimes sweet
it's sometimes tart,
The Lord knows best —
We play our part!

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THAT PRESENCE WITHIN

i can break off from anyone,
except that presence within:
never divided is the unity
that has always been.

i can break off from anyone,
except that presence within:
it never leaves me,
no matter how often
i run away.

i can break off from anyone,
except that presence within:
rejection and abandonment
flow in and out
like endless tides,
surface changes on eternity.

i can break off from anyone,
except that presence within:
how can i peel away
my own self?


"i can break off from anyone,
except that presence within" — a line from Rumi

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AGAIN

the robot life
grey and moldy
losing self
in dark, imploding
emotions spiraling down
left
of my center.
who is running the show,
anyway?

looking left and right,
trying not to trip
over
my own toes.
keeping my head up
so i can see
some light,
maybe
the sky
when it is blue.

listening to inner
cranial pounding
like a tape
slicking wild
around its track,
not making sense
or even caring.

the days fall into one another,
stumbling, crashing.
and who knows how,
a sudden awakening
and forward
movement
again.

the window opens
to a lifegiving breeze
coursing thru every
cellular
nook and cranny,
crying
"Yes."

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LOVE GROWS

everyday
i get a little happier
as my love for you
grows

like an opening rose
whose perfume
uplifts the soul.

where has all the darkness gone?
consumed in your light.

where has all the tightness gone?
transformed by your love

into a hollow reed
singing the song You play
through every illumined cell

humming Baba.

there are no words
for life of the spirit,
only heart waves
of gratitude and love

filling the wide space
of self's departure

yet i long for the final
annihilation
at the foot
of Your glance...

there is no calling
except your love
whispering
leave all
and become One

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DIVINE BLESSING

in this moment
Baba's love is pouring down on me,
through me, and around me.
i swim in His ocean
of untroubled bliss

lost to myself.
i see only Him
in every dancing particle

i know not how
this came to be —
ignorance falling away
and His sweet love
enveloping me
in all that is
and ever could be.

He has brought this smile
to my being,
this boundless joy in my heart.
what mystery that one so unworthy
should be visited by the King!

the shadowy taste
of this glory
will linger
in my being
transformed,
marking the way
to the final true dying
in Him.

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I LOVE YOU

i love you
and that is all.

thanking you,
my blessings flower
into gratitude

help me to be the instrument
of your work.
i give you my life
offering it
without restraint.
grant me the courage
to go beyond my fear
in coming ever closer
to You.

what is this life
if not
being with you?

if you are not present
and permeating every
thought, action, and feeling,
existence is hollow,
a dark
mean prison.

i want to be free
wild and open,
flowing as
Your divine energy.
carry me up
into your arms,
embrace me.
let your love
dissolve me,
dear One. please,
emerge as my real self
in each moment,
every breath.

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ALLAH, ALLAH

Allah, Allah
there is but One
among many

always there
always indivisible
always invisible

except for eyes
Divine

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I WANT

i want
i want
so many things.
states.
experiences

all keeping me
shackled to density
and duality

i want to be loved
i want to be love
i want to be free
i want to be independent
i want to be your slave
i want to be surrendered
i want to care
i want to be rock-like
i want to dance
i want to be still
i want to create
i want emptiness

how about i want nothing

i want not to want

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DANCING, MY BELOVED

dancing, my beloved
in your arms
i waltz
weightlessly
on currents
of love and light

hearing the inner music
of heart's melody
drawing me every closer
as i merge in you

'til at last
we don't exist —
neither you
nor i —

only breath
Is

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RESURRECTION POEM

you say you don't like
the dance
as if you were never
consulted —
but that's not true
and self pity rage
suck life.

rise up
from the heap of ashes
to join the light beams.

life is always good.

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WITHOUT YOUR LOVE

i am in such pain without You,
and nothing can happen
without Your grace.

the words, the repetitions,
are aridly mechanical,
the breeze of love
blowing through stone corridors
only comes
with Your glance.

bring me close
please, Baba.
hold me to your heart
so i melt
in soft oneness.

lift me up
beyond this self
absorption
so that i may truly see
and be one
with You.

so much pain and grief
held in this little heart
crying out to You!
have pity, Baba.
nothing can be
without
Your love.

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PERFECTION

we come to His followers, starry-eyed with love of the One,
knowing He is in all, and who could contain Him more than His lovers;
only to find people with hearts of every size, shape and content not so
different from groups everywhere, except His hand softening up sanskaras
like doughbread shooting out fiery sparks of change and transmutation,
looking like the devil sometimes.

oh it's a brutal fall from expectation's lofty pedestal
to the here and now reality
that He cannot be confused with his Lovers;
they are never His equivalent, no matter heart's loving devotion.
they are limited containers and He's the infinite ocean;
they are tainted and He is pure,
they are progressing, He is the Goal itself perfect Perfection!

we have to be dis-illusioned from looking anywhere outside,
thinking we can make an easy substitute for the fire
of burning all dross from the heart.
it is there He resides!
He shines everywhere, but lives in that abode.

how long before you realize which way to face?
with the Sun before you, the shadows disappear.

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MORNING POEM TO BABA
Aug 23, 2004

your soft silky tresses
caressed my face!
so close
to your breath
i felt Love's hum
singing Light
into every cell
forming a cocoon
of no admittance
to life's pain

you caressed
my cheek
in most tender
sweetness
melting
lifetimes'
grief and sorrow
softening
suffering's
hard angles
into
gentle flow

oh miraculous
wonder


you smiled
and the universe glowed
millions of light stars
pouring out of your eyes
in endless mystery
of love's
creation

i bowed deeply
placing heart and head
in profoundest
gratitude
at your perfect
slender feet
gentle tears
washing o'er them
in wondrous joy

my love so full
no more
words to say

the fullness
of Silence
has become
the Way

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YES, BABA

you are making me
helpless
and hopeless,
except for
coming near to you.

everything else
you take away,
which i
don't mind,
if it brings me
closer.

i am a mess
with everything
upside down
so out of sorts,
knowing
no direction
except
what leads
to your feet.

i wish
i were different,
but feel
this is how
you want me.
so amidst
the sobs
i say
"yes, Baba."

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LEGACY OF LOVE

He dropped his body
and seems no more.

What legacy does this leave?

that which eternally
resides in the heart.
there you will find Him
gloriously alive
in this moment!

no need to become a mullah
worshiping words
creating caste systems
of dictatorial
correctness

when even His words
implemented
with loveless
self-satisfaction
create more bindings.

the mind is not the answer

not the way to know Truth


it is Love
which awakens
and guides

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THIS IS NOT THE TIME

this is not the time for words
(it once was)
heavy, limited
and full of angles

give me Wine!
that flowing sparkle
aromatic sweet essence

of who i am

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INTO YOUR EMBRACE

i cannot see beyond
the cobalt sky's
puffy clouds
unless i gaze inward

in the vast space
i search for you
thinking there is name and face
but in this perfection
only silence
winks

slowly slowly the need for
having and knowing
falls to the wayside
like outworn ragged coverings
that served their use
once

now a bold step
or should i say surrender
into your nameless soundless
embrace

peace is

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WHAT IS REAL

what is there to say?

when words
are as substantial
as vaporizing steam

can i send you a kiss by courier

or buy jewels with counterfeit coin?

only Love is real

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IF I COULD LOVE YOU

if i could love You
as i want
and as you deserve
there'd be no me
(doing anything)

so this is dream
and a game
and i play my part
full heartedly
without attachment,
You say

but i am not in control!
i can't obey
as much as i'd like
and you state
IT IS ALL ME,
anyway

so why do i feel guilty
when i'm just a dream
and You're the one
writing the script
and acting all the parts?

it befuddles the mind
| (which You like)
and leaves only
Love

to answer all
the questions

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WHO IS THE ONE

who is the one
who thinks she is
in control?
who has any say
about anything
at all...

a little gnat
making big noise
saying i'm here
pay attention.

what humor
the Creator has,
what a joke
sublime!

we flap and stomp
cry and whine
and dance and sing

and it is all
a dream.

as Kabir says,
"You've been asleep
for millions of years.
why not wake up
this morning?"

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IN YOUR SWEET EMBRACE

happily i rest in your sweet arms
an embrace so comforting
i melt into utter tenderness,
a sweet silence
colored pink
by your all knowing, all caring

presto vanishes
the whiney (not winey!) self
and fear's unconnectedness,
mind's tyrannical agenda
of worldly worries
loosened and set free

what liberation the quiet mind
the open heart
the peace of surrender

i ask your help
your sweet caring
to extend this moment
to another and another
grace-ful presence
in your Love

in this place
i am home

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THE IMPOSSIBLE BECOMES EASY

thru your Grace
the impossible becomes easy.

poise and flowering were out of reach
until I gave it all to You,
surrendering in trust,
everything became possible.

a miracle.
yet how could it be otherwise?

Oh, Beloved God-Man,
such mysteries of Love!

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LOVE DIVINE

"What would you like to say or do...?"
anything, Beloved, that would please you.
"fame and fortune, treasures galore
most people want more ... and more.

remain in my arms
remain at my feet,
consider this Love
God's special treat

you have come far
to enjoy this splendor,
let not thought deter you
from this abode to enter.

the prize is this love
untarnished by self,
kings would give all
for a taste of this wealth.

smile and be happy
always of good cheer.
the rose blooms forever
in the heart that is clear.

Love! Love! Love!
let the light shine.
send my message to all
in this Love Divine."

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SO MUCH LOVE ALL AROUND!

so much love all around!
every person, animal, flower, tree
smiles and nods
at the fragrance of love
that fills the atmosphere
and wondrously transports me
to that timeless land
of utter sweetness.

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SILENCE DAY BEGINS...

silence day begins...

silence the mind
the thoughts, desires, and self-will
and lay them at His feet
beside the fragrant jasmine

let the mind become vast blue sky
infinite, eternal silence...
whose particles of
radiant love and light
are untouched by illusion's play

let the mind open up
and swallow
the beingness before creation
whose song is a melody
of HU

God's soundless sound
in our hearts
that can lead us
all the way
Home

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EGO KNOWS SURRENDER ... LOVE KNOWS ONENESS

the ego knows surrender ... love knows oneness

my heart knows love
expansive and ever expanding
infinite radiance!
that is the pure all
of this existence
and blesses me
greatly

reaching up to the sky
touching stars
and heavens

dancing in freedom
and abandon

to God's rhythm
and silent sound
of oneness

i am lost and dissolved
in the beginningless beginning
that has no end

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I AM LOVING YOU

"i am loving You sweetly... deeply... silently... devotedly... wildly... exuberantly... divinely...

as the ocean is sometimes quiet, deep and still, at other times all movement...
so is my heart"

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THIS WONDROUS LOVE

"this wondrous and mysterious love i feel for/with You
goes ever deeper and ceaselessly higher,
and spreads so vastly
as to become a shoreless ocean..."

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HEED NOT THE MIND

heed not the mind ... let it not disturb
your peace, your knowing, your very being.
rest in absolute certainty of His love
that holds you so tenderly
offering a river of guidance and protection
that dissolves the fears and obstructions.
share the love and light,
the healer and the teacher.
the more you are a clear and open channel
the more you grow in Love's mysterious ways.
the heart is beautiful, infinite and pure.

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THE KAABA OF THE HEART

each day the seeker's pilgrimage
is to the kaaba of the heart;
circling and circling the Great Mystery
he dissolves in surrenderance
at its still and silent core

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MY LIFE IS MY PRAYER AND PRAISE

my life is my prayer and praise

i want it to be pure and holy and selfless
but that is rarely the case.
often it is full of me instead of Thee
a sleepwalking forgetfulness
of identification with density
when the door to the heavens
stands invitingly wide open

let my life itself speak of my gratitude
my infinite gratitude and thankfulness
for your Grace, Beauty, Love
and utmost caring...

let my every step be a prayer
and my every word praise,
may my every touch be tenderness
and my every thought be of Oneness ...

may i know the bliss of no self
existing only as Love,
serving with every breath that
you've so generously bequeathed ...

Divine Beloved! Most Holy One!
all praise is Yours.

You are all Light
Love and Mercy

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THIS MORNING ALL TENDERNESS

this morning all tenderness
gentleness and softness
like a pink cloud floating
in the infinite azure

opening of the heart
pulsating with life's breath
of gratitude and thankfulness
surrendering all separation
in Your Holy Name
of Love

all praise is Yours
oh beautiful One ...
Reality behind the manyness.
all Grace is Yours
all Love, only Love

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LOVE CAME

love came
i was surprised
i'd had no plans
no hopes
no dreams
for life to become
passionate melting ecstasy

i danced i smile
i cried i soared
my heart expanded
into infinite love

overflowing its container
it showered and flooded
mountains and plains
feeding plants and flowers
that blossomed everywhere

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LOVE TRICKS YOU

love tricks you
it sneaks into your life
and takes over
it turns you upside down
and inside out
creating a wild
majnun of the desert

and when you are
lost and dazed
it says time for housecleaning
let's clear out
everything
that is not me

so you gasp and choke
whine and act out
as the dust of your past rises up and consumes you

bewildered and suffering
you don't understand
that this is really most definitely
a very good thing

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IN LOVE'S BLAZING FURNACE

In love's blazing furnace
flames are reaching
high to illumine
the inner sky

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I CAN SEE BEYOND

i can see beyond
the cobalt sky
if my gaze
is focused inward

searching for you
in vast space
infinite silence
prevails

like outworn ragged coverings
the desire for having
and knowing falls
to the wayside

and in your
unfathomable
embrace
i lose myself
forever

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HOW LONG

how long
before you realize
which way to face?
with the Sun before you
all the shadows
disappear.

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DANCE IN RHYTHM

dance in rhythm
to the Holy breath
sing songs from
the heart
of living love
be happy
where you are
as you are
right here
right now
without rules
and judgment
of how it's supposed
to be
the flower blooms perfectly
in its right time

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THANK YOU FOR BEING THERE!

thank you for being there!
even when i couldn't feel your loving support
the tender twinkle
of your compassionate gaze
the deep knowing
in your fathomless eyes
the connection in the heart
that never goes ...

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THERE ARE NO WORDS

there are no words
for life of the spirit,
only heart waves
of gratitude and love

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LOVE IS

love is unity and oneness, caring and compassion.
love is Holy. Precious. Divine.
love is beyond words and form ...
it is gentleness sublime,
achingly tender,
fiery and passionate,
burning and melting,
expansive and unbounded ...
it is without limit or definition

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I HAVE GIVEN UP SO MUCH

i have given up so much
and hardly even noticed
as its become easier and easier
not to worry —
leaving all in Your hands
has been my ticket to peace.
but look what's arrived — now
i am down on my knees!
this attachment i have
is consuming my life.
there will be no rest
until selflessness is achieved.
There will be no rest
until Surrender is complete.

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IT IS IMPORTANT TO RELEASE JUDGMENTS

it is important to release judgments
of how things ought to be,
the unconscious unspoken demand
of 'my will is what should be'.

God knows all and is all
there are no mistakes, you see
surrendering self is the only way
to escape pain and misery.

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I THINK I AM READY

what a melodramatic soap opera
i am in ...
think i'm ready
to change the channel
now

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LOVE PICKS YOU UP

Love picks you up
like flower puff on the wind
transporting you to unnamed lands
of milk and honey
where ecstasy whirls its dance
in selfless sweet abandon
and dazed travelers
lose their I-ness
in the Ocean of Love

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LOVE LEAVES NO TRACE

love leaves no trace, no sound, no mark,
no displacement of anything
love holds, caresses, whispers, touches, soothes,
enfolds and supports
anything and everything
it bumps up against
it captures and captivates
enriching, endowing, enhancing
everything it permeates

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YOUR PRESENCE HAS IGNITED A FIRE IN MY HEART

Your presence has ignited a fire in my heart
and illumined the night sky.
tears of joy glisten in unbounded love,
and stars dance their way across the heavens.

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LOVE IS DEEP IN THE EYES

Love is deep in the eyes,
full in the heart,
a Light in the soul.

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SOMETIMES EMPTY

sometimes empty
feels like loss

and sometimes
like gain

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LOVE IS RAPTUROUS

love is rapturous, love is serene.
love pulls you close and love pushes you away.
love grinds you up and makes you into a shining jewel.
it tears your heart to pieces
and then re-creates you
into a wonder and mystery
of great beauty.

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I AM SO HELPLESS

i am so helpless
and dependent
on You;
i am so happy to be surrendered
to You!
my quiet mind and bubbling joy
say i am nothing and so glad of it.
i sacrifice my little will to the Great Will
that is omniscient and eternally
compassionate and benevolent,
which provides with perfection
exactly what is needed
in each moment
for each of us.
whether rose or thorn
His mercy and glory is manifested,
shining divinity
into our little lives
like the sun
warms the earth

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WHAT BLISS THE QUIET MIND

what bliss the quiet mind
the open heart
the peace of surrender

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LOVE SINGS ENCHANTING MELODIES


Love sings enchanting melodies
and creates harmonies never heard
by the outer ear

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I AM FIGHTING

i am fighting
the Holy War...
exhausting bloody battles!
downright shocking
false self's continuing hold
with its cravings and agendas
born of separation
and illusion.
but i have enlisted
His Holy Help,
and He never lets me down!
each battle is won
through sweat and tears...
and then i rise
a little lighter.

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YOU ARE MY FRIEND, MY BELOVED

you are my Friend, my Beloved
and everything
comes from You.
everything that arrives
is love and only Love.

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SOFTLY POURS A GENTLE STREAM

softly pours a gentle stream
of tender glistening tears;
there are no words
for there is no understanding.
there is only love —
pure Love.

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I WANTED TO ALWAYS BE WITH YOU

i wanted to always be with you
forever more in every breath
in every thought and
every beat of the heart.
now i stand alone on an island
wondering where are you?

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IF I COULD TOTALLY SURRENDER

if i could totally surrender
i would do so, dear Lord,
in one instant.
i would be no more

if i could totally surrender
i would dissolve into the ocean
never knowing separation again.
no i or you, just oneness divine.

if i could totally surrender
there would be only bliss
all would be infinite
and eternal Truth...

if only i could

i would.

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IF I COULD GET OUT OF MYSELF

if i could get out of myself
i'd peel away me
like an old banana skin
revealing the lush ripe fruit inside
sweet and ready to be devoured.

when something has served its purpose
to discard it incurs no blame.

as Master Rumi says, "For those who live
by the Light of God, the death
of the little self is a replenishment."

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WHATEVER HAPPENS

Whatever happens
good or bad,
Your perfume is there.

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TRANSFORMATION OFTEN INVOLVES SEISMIC INNER UPHEAVAL

transformation often involves seismic inner upheaval
and a tsunami of tears.
when you are on the other side of it,
which you will be one day,
all the intensity is just a flat memory —
a blurred image from the past

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THERE ARE MANY DIFFERENT TEARS

there are many different tears.
some are so gracefully gentle
and filled with gratitude...
i think of them
as friends.

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ONLY LOVE IS REAL

Only Love is Real.
And life is too short
Not to be real about Love.

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ONCE YOU GIVE YOUR LIFE AWAY

once you give your life away
your mind no longer works
to figure out
what is happening to you.

His doing is His business!
your is to comply.

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A WAKING ALLEGORY ABOUT ACQUIRING
THE INTOXICATING TASTE FOR "LOVING GOD"

at a certain time in one's life,
a time probably divinely ordained,
an individual comes into contact with a particular seasoning,
a special and unique taste that enlivens everything for him.
so he seeks it, acquires it
and begins to bring it into his life more and more,
putting it on this and that, here and there...
and then he becomes so strongly attracted to it,
that when it is absent, his life feels dull, insipid, lifeless, anemic...
and so this seasoning/taste becomes a requirement for him,
perhaps moving in the direction of obsession.
but what harm? it is good, enlivening, uplifting, energizing,
and brings him happiness.
at some point he is no longer just sprinkling this seasoning
here and there and finally everywhere;
he is making a thick marinade
and everything that is his and that he comes in contact with
he marinates in this juice, elixir, wine.
it has finally become his life.
and really it is like adding chili to food.
at first it is shocking and a bit much,
but then you start to like it.
and eventually food just seems boring and dull without it.
until finally you are burning head to toe from the chili and loving it!
you want it more and more, and still yet more.
you are on fire!
and then you are gone in the fire!"

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INSPIRED LOVE RAMBLE AND PRAYER

Love is the way, my path, my goal, my Teacher, my companion, my friend, my lover, my God ... it is my Truth, my pain, my trial, my tears, my beauty.

Love is my sustenance, my being; my balm, my cure, my tonic and elixir; it is my delight, my ecstasy, my warmth, my comfort, my refuge, my life and breath ...

Love is my heart, my longing and my aching,

Love is my life, my beauty, my adventure, my cross, my transformation, my resurrection, my salvation.

Love is my destiny, my home, my destination.

Love is every person/critter, flower, rock and tree, drop of rain and sunshine, every mountain, river ocean and sea, every star sun and moon, every touch and caress, every soft word spoken or unsaid.

Love is silence, fullness, emptiness, every sound and melody and rhythm, every dance and turning, every planet whirling within and without.

Love is light, love is radiance and effulgence, love is a smile and twinkle in the eye, a tender touch, a warm embrace, a whisper in one's ear, the taste of honey.

Love is infinity and eternity, realms of light and transcendence, love is God's abode, His name, and His essence.

Love is the warmth of hands held, self dissolving into nothingness.

Love is unity and oneness, caring and compassion.

Love is Holy. Precious. Divine.

Love is beyond words and form, gentleness sublime, achingly tender, fiery and passionate, burning and melting, expansive and unbounded ... without limit or definition.

Love is intimacy's whisper and sigh, celestial music and rhythmic drumming, divine ecstatic dancing.

Love is prayer, surrender, gratitude and thankfulness ... praise and glory, hallelujah and amen.

Love is sweet, delicious and delectable ... a kiss, a hug, a smile, and laughter.

Love is deep in the eyes, full in the heart, a light in the soul.

Love is you, me, every One.

Love is the growing green grass of spring and the dried leaves of fall, the snowy peaks of winter and the scorching blaze of summer.

Love is the fresh innocence of the baby and the aging cloak of the departing.

Love is ever new and dynamic, and also deeply still; full and ever-Present.

Love is melting and dissolving.

Love is death — love is life.

Love is presence.

Love Is.

Love is the question and love is the answer.

Love is every thing and no thing, everything and nothing.

Love is rapturous, love is serene.

Love pulls you close and love pushes you away.

Love grinds you up and makes you into a shining jewel. it tears your heart to pieces and then recreates you into a wonder and mystery of beauty. it opens you up, clears you out, creates a light body.

Love plumbs the depths and soars the highest heights. its reach is wide across all horizons and boundaries.

Love sings enchanting melodies, creates harmonies never heard by the outer ear.

Love takes you out into spheres beyond time and space. it takes you 'there'. it is all kindness and caring, and also a strong task master.

Divine love brooks no compromise of self.

Love's teachings cannot be grasped by the intellect, it has its own ways of knowing and being.

Love is the water of life. no life can prosper without it. it is the food and sustenance all need and crave.

Love is how we thrive. it gives meaning and joy to life. life is a parched and barren desert without it. with love come the date trees, the refreshing life-giving oasis, the comforting shade.

Love engenders true companionship, closeness and sharing, throughout life's travails.

Love is always there, a support and guide in every circumstance. it is wisdom and true knowledge, it is Truth itself. it is every color in the rainbow, every shade and every hue. it is the beat of the heart, the feeling tone of life. it is a soft cloud that welcomes and envelopes, a sweet sweet refuge.

Love is the heart — so small and yet so vast, so magnificent. it is the abode of God and the Self.

Love is the mystery of Mysteries. it can only be known by the heart and love itself. one can only surrender to its majesty, power and beauty, and be swept away by it — leaving one's small self far behind, changed forever.

Sometimes love's call is a loud bell ringing, sometimes a soft whisper like a baby's smile. whichever way it comes to you, leave everything to follow it! be its dedicated pupil and servant. there is no greater gift of God than the blessing of Love. and then share it with every breath and movement, send it out into the world, let it touch and transform everything it meets.

Be courageous in love. don't hold back. cast aside doubt and fear and jump right into the fire! soon you will be a dancing spark of glowing love and then a bonfire.

Love is endless and infinite and lasts to eternity ... may love always live in my heart. and may i always share that love and light with others. praise God.

Alhamdulillah! Let Love Abide ... Ameen, Ameen

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LOVE HAS MADE ME A BEGGAR

Love has made me a beggar and a pauper,
sacrificing all at love's fiery altar.

I have loved so simply, so fully, truly
a transparency without walls.

Forever i live in gratitude and thankfulness
for every blessed moment.

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ALL THAT HAPPENS

All that happens
is for the growth of the Soul.

Every single thing
is an opportunity
on that level,

no matter how it may look
from the outside.

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A ROSE IS THE SPLENDOR OF THE ONE

a Rose is the splendor of the One
exhuding His fragrance
into this density we inhabit.
it speaks of glories and mysteries
beyond our capacity to know.
it freely shares its Love
and never asks who or why.
it's radiance compells a response
from the heart,
evoking nightingale's
mournful plaint.

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WHAT IS THERE TO TELL?

what is there to tell?
i don't know who i am
and certainly don't know
HU He is...

if there is anything
which i know
it is that this life
is mysterious and inscrutable.

anything i say
is a breeze wafting in Silence.
Love is my only anchor
here.

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NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU DESIRE THE FLOWER

No matter how much you desire the flower,
you cannot rush the seed!
It has its own time and process.
To interfere with that
may cause damage.
Result: no flower.

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ONCE IN A DREAM

Once in a dream
Love came to me,
announcing, "I am your Teacher".
Immediately, I became a devoted pupil.

And ever will be.

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THIS LIFE ALWAYS HAS TESTS

This life always has tests
as long as attachments are left.

I think the struggle, the friction,
is what propels us along in our journey
and after the struggle and friction,
comes the peace.

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HEART ACHE

heart ache
cries out
when where how
if not now.

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LOVE RAMBLE #2

Just be
in the moment
as Love.

Just be present Now,
as Love in the heart.
BE now.
Be Love.
Be present
right here
right now
as love in the heart.

Love is your teacher;
love is you;
love is your path;
and also your goal.

Keep coming back
as often as you stray,
to that LOVE in YOUR HEART,
your true being!

The mind is the tormentor,
the betrayer disguised.
The more you succumb
to mind's thoughts,
the more you suffer.

Rest in your heart as love,
as pure love,
as divine love,
as holy love
without object.

LOVE equals God,
Baba, Supreme Reality.
Be who you are ... Love!

How instantaneously
transformative!

Love, love, love,
radiant, infinite Love.

Love, here and now,
each breath,
each moment,
uplifting, expanding,
and all-encompassing.

This is your gift
this lifetime.

BE LOVE!

BE WHO YOU
TRULY ARE

Remember
and Be.

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AH, YOUR WINGS!

Ah, your wings!
You can't fail if you don't open them;
but then you can't learn to fly either!

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MY HEART MET HIS AND I EXPLODED IN LOVE

My heart met his and I exploded in Love;
I became a breathing, living poem of ecstasy.

He crushed my heart and I died in devastation
becoming a poem of sadness and ruins.

I rose transformed and turned to the eternal now
living as Love — an ode to His Grace.

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YOU CANNOT CHANGE THE COURSE OF DESTINY

you cannot change the course of destiny,
only create happiness or suffering
along the way.

so choose peace and joy.
rest in your beautiful loving heart.
know that all is well.

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EMPTY BELL RINGING

empty bell ringing
soundless melodies,
faint echoes
of ancient
journeys
thru mists
of hidden lands

i ask you
when
i ask you
how
i ask you
why
and then
Silence

i know
the way
is thru
stillness
in the mind
and openness
of heart

giving
you
piece by piece
self's
last attempts
at arising
and claiming
what it never
owned
and never was

this ceaseless
yearning
to be
truth
and
God
... One
in every
conceivable
and
unimaginable
way
eternally

Beloved
i bow
and kiss your toes
and the dust
of holy earth
beneath your
lotus
feet

my blessing
is not to be
me
and empty
fill with
all your
splendor
and generosity
such beauty
love
and truth...
the fragrance
of rose and jasmine
lifting
into the moon's
light and shadow

stars twinkle
whirl
and smile
at the joy
of Your true
resplendence

oh words
oh thoughts
have you no shame

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I SAW THE BLACK BIRD OF SORROW

i saw the black bird of sorrow
fly away from me — silently heading high
beyond the clouds, carrying a mighty burden of pain
to the Light Divine.

in one unexpected and wondrous moment of subtle
yet life-changing benevolence and mercy
i felt the release and flight of lifetimes
of pain, grief, and trauma.

stunned and speechless
i marveled in amazement
at the God-Man's
unfathomable ways...
all praise and gratitude, Beloved MEHER BABA!

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I AM SO UTTERLY HUMBLED

i am so utterly
humbled
at suddenly seeing
the lies upon lies
of self-delusion.

trapped in a mind game
and sanskaras,
the false self
never sees
the real stakes....
despite the pain
of spiritual longing
behind it all

this master plan
says you will conquer it
or, it will conquer you!
no grey area
sitting on the fence
this lifetime

so whatcha gonna do?
now the light of awareness
has shone on
the moment
and the way ahead

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SEPARATION

separation—

a pain
that is both
blunt and sharp

an echo reverberating
thru layers of the three bodies
and the seven planes

soundless
and yet piercing
in its cry

oh soul

how long can this be borne?

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MY LOVE FOR YOU

my love for you
sadly is bound
by the false self...

help me
clean out this cup
of yearning

let it shine with hunger
and emptiness

let its crying call
compell you to answer!

oh Beloved, fill it
with the sweet
lifegiving nectar
of the Real

it is only You
Hu can satisfy
this heart's plea

time is getting short
and i can't do it on my own
Beloved

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GIVE EVEN MORE THANKS

give even more thanks
for this
moving closer
opportunity
and trust
you are loved
taken care of
indeed blessed...
though burning
is never fun.

the wild turns of the heart
from ecstasy to devastation
now reborn
as vast compassion
in the heart.

can you see the beauty
beyond the tears?

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ENDLESS TEARS

oh Baba
how long has it been?

i don't know much
about time
but i could say
"forever"

at least the greatest
part of the last
thirty-five years

mountains of salt
lifetimes of purifying
and not done yet

oh lord!

only you baba
not a friend, lover, mate
or family member
to distract me
from the eternal truth
of my aloneness
or is it oneness?
with you

stark naked alone
in this universe
and yet no more
or less fulfilled
than when the
karma and drama
with others
is in full ballroom swing

am i gonna make it Baba
you said everything
would turn out fine
but never said when!
this lifetime
or many down the road.

what is it going to take
to get me to switch tracks
from self aborption
to Self Truth!
a lot of wearing out
and more to go
it seems

but You are mysterious
and whimsical
any bloody anything
can happen in that
wink of an I

kill me now
slay that false one
who creates this
endless suffering
i am begging
thru the tears

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WHERE DOES THIS TENACITY COME FROM?

somewhere deep inside
beyond the pain and melodrama
faith and hope
must live eternal!

i am surprised
and encouraged
to come upon
a solitary candle
of Divine Light
beaming from the center
of my own inner being
steadfastly shining
behind and beyond
maya's dark turmoil,
guiding and summoning
what feels impossible
in this sea of
helpless and hopeless

what a true friend
this Light
who patiently
perseveres

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SOMETIMES

sometimes
I just need a break
'cause I get so close
to the breaking point
sometimes.

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A GENTLE BREEZE

a gentle breeze blowing
over heart's center
how change creeps up
and suddenly surprises you
spine straightening
energy moving
mountain-like presence

when the new race began
the shot was never heard
and the filly was already out of the gate
and down the track
suddenly taking notice
of air blue sky and sunshine

feeling life's
exhilaration
nodding an inner
smiling Yes

even if

it be

short lived

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YOU ARE

You are
the light around me
and in me
the oceanic love
that sweeps thru
cleanses and uplifts
the sweetness in word, thought and deed
the tenderness of heart
the smile and twinkle of the eyes
the fire inside
ever reaching flames
the surrender
the bliss
the journeying to Self
you are my guide, mentor,
Master, love, lover, Beloved
friend, companion, Lord, Self
the rose in my heart
the thorn beneath my foot
the doubts fears and anxiety
the joy laughter and love
the tears so oceanic
the clouds that pass
rain that falls
the endless cycles of life
the Truth
the sword
the embrace
the trust,
the faith,
the perseverance
to keep going
the pain anguish and longing
the love
the expression and the Silence
the knowing and not knowing
the bliss of absence and emptiness
the joy of fullness
the pain of separation
the glow in the night
the rising star and setting sun
the day and the night
the music and the quiet
the birds, the flight
the mother love
the father protection
the friendship of the soul
meeting
recognizing
unity
the pleasure, the pain,
the wanting
and desirelessness
the everything and the nothing
always ever and no time
singing dancing
mindless flow
into vastness
among the stars
peace within
sweetness flowing
light shining
happiness abounding
life eternal

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SUDDENLY

suddenly
a subtle encompassing
quiet and peace
so easily unnoticed
yet dazzling
in heart generosity

after my descent
into the unspeakable pain
a complete surprise
(I see Him twinkling)

divine formula or whim
miracles occur
with phenomenal frequency
I am just beginning
to notice

at the end of the storm
is a golden sky

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A SUDDEN WELLING UP OF EMOTION

a sudden welling up of emotion
I know not from whence it comes
so poignantly touching my heart
tears come to my eyes.

I allow and watch and let it be,
as the clouds pass over the sky,
sometimes bringing healing rain.
sometimes torrents so wildly violent and forceful.
whatever is, it is
here in the moment
staying empty of content
is so full
the shoot of a tender
new revelation
divine mystery of Grace
filled with shining presence!

thankfulness replaces emotion
and peace returns.

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GRIEF ON MY PLATE

so swiftly and decisively
the candle was blown out...
the breath stopped
the spirit departed the form
and an empty hulk remained
the parting gift
a huge dark abyss
in the life
that had been 'ours'

the bright luminescence
the cosmic heart
the rock like support
was frighteningly absent
in one second
of illusory time

I seemed so accepting
so understanding
but it was shock
displacement
profound loss

you got free!
I was so happy for you
out of the pain
of the 3D body
the trials of duality
and I sensed your vast spirit
flying so ecstatically
somersaulting in the heavens
as all your many lifetimes
friends surrounded you
in joyous welcome

and now it is not just you
who is gone
but all the wonderful
most loving of love critters
and here there is
chaotic emptiness
for company...
a new town, different people
no established anything
except the endless tears

challenged to come out
from my retreat
to face and swim in this
alien world,
learn by a sudden dropping
into the deep end
no life preserver
no helping hands
and fear galore

I sunk, I cried, I went numb
in the blackness
the terror — losing control
with the threatening whirlpool
pulling me down and down
into the naked alone
where my Self remained
hidden

and still does
although now
I am closer to the surface
as I see and feel Light
once more
though unpredictably
intermittently
swinging from faint flicker
to peaceful amplitude

so many sad notes
in my life song now
a plaintive eastern melody
of a lost soul wandering
a limitless desert

running toward sparkling mirages
that evaporate in my face
with no choice but to continue
left foot right foot
begging for Mercy

I taste this grief fully
as the food on my plate.
the trials continue
the challenges unceasing
the imperative to get free
says now or never
as the personal tick tocks
become quieter and slower
imaging Dali's melted clock
running down...

I can only do my best
oh Lord, you know
I've tried
inadequate as it may be.
the rest belongs to You.

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I WILL CREATE

I will create, express
as long as energy swells
emotions build
release cries out
from unknown
hidden depths.
let them surface

I give you wings
and sky
in which to fly
and be
whatever you
need to say
my ears are open
my heart is soft
room has been made
for you...
in whatever way or form
you want to be.

yes!
there is so much
energy inside
wild parrot colors
erupting out of the brain-mind
shooting stars of energy
looking for their home
needing to exhaust themselves
before they can rest
in peaceful quietude...
getting straight
in whatever way
they were crooked
or cramped
opening into vastness
untrammeled
oh!

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HOW DO I LOVE YOU...

how do i love You...
can i count the ways?
i love Thee in the fullness of my heart
in the expansion of my consciousness
in the spirit of my being
eternal and infinite;
in the tiniest movement, thought, and feeling
in the tender gesture and the forgetfulness
in the singing, laughing, and weeping
in the sunshine and the dark clouds
in every word and utter Silence
in stillness and commotion
in all time and also beyond time
in every dew-laden blade of grass
in every tear that falls from my eye
in every rose and every thorn
in all that is and is not...
that is how i love You.

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MOVING CLOSER AS THE RIVER EMPTIES INTO THE OCEAN

a joyful celebration is due!
love abounds and surrounds,
birds sing, crickets dance.
the cat curls up against the warm beating heart,
purring its pleasure.

night falls as a blanket of twinkling stars dance in the heavens,
moving towards the sun's glorious announcement of God's latest creation:
another day.

all these wonders so vast and so tiny,
like the world in a grain of sand.
HUUUUU sounds and babies cry.
roses bloom and lovers embrace.
God alone is.

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SOMETIMES I WEEP AND SMILE

sometimes i weep and smile when i think of you
other times you are not in my mind
somehow the days go on —
a panorama of muted tones
with teases of beckoning light
there's no defining time or space
just now now now
contraction and expansion
light and dark
all swirling into
marbelized oneness
in this heart so stunned
and tender

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I AM SO TOUCHED

i am so touched, i weep softly and deeply in the tenderness of each of our struggles. oh such bravery and courage in the face of great fear, ceaseless challenges, loss and suffering. the human heart hurts, callouses over, breaks open, then pours out light and love. maybe a hesitant trickle at first, yet the start of something grand. my own heart broken and newly wide open whispers 'thank you'.


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View Katie Rose's paintings of Meher Baba

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Contact Katie Rose


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